This week, I wanted to write a little about a particular song and how it affects a particular client of mine. This client is fairly young for hospice care and has an uncommon diagnosis. Due to HIPPA, I do not want to divulge too much information, but let's suffice it to say that he has been living with a developmental delay for his whole life. I've never actually gotten a word out of him. In fact, he spends a lot of time in bed, staring at the wall. Still, he deserves the same level of care, if not more, than anybody else.
He's really a sweet guy and he has a very supportive family. When I first started visiting him, the nursing staff told me, "Oh, he'll love having you visit. His favorite song is 'Jesus Loves Me'." So, I led off with "Jesus Loves Me" and he made eye contact with me, moved his head around, and occasionally made a noise, as though trying to sing along. Then I moved to some other "Sunday School"-style songs, but got no response, whatsoever. He simply stared at the wall. I played "Jesus Loves Me" again, and he reacted the same as before. I'm still not sure what it is about that song that affects him on such a base level! I just know that every time I play that song, which is every other song now, he perks up and seems to really interact with me. I don't understand it, but that's what happens.
In some ways, I envy him. Imagine having a connection to a song that was so strong, so ingrained in your being, that it was always fresh, new, and meaningful. In a time when top 40 radio is a constant blur of "old" songs being replaced by new, he is still in love with this song. And what a song to have a connection with! Regardless of your faith system, this song is empowering and validating the person singing it, even if he's singing it in his head. This song tells the singer that they are loved and important. "Jesus Loves Me" does not make stipulations on its love or ability. In fact, it says that when you are weaker, you are loved more! When you break it down, this song is very profound in our day and age. Television, radio, billboards, and music all tell us what we need to do to be better, whether that's looking better, buying nicer things, or being part of some special group. This song is simple, easy to remember, and is packed with love for the singer.
I hope that everyone reading this can find a song that really speaks to them this week. Find it and cling to it because it validates the best parts of you and doesn't care about the rest. No one is perfect, but everyone deserves to feel loved. I think music is one of the best ways to show that. I find that song, listen to it so many times you know it by heart, and live your life with the feeling it gives you.
I'm so pleased to hear people with disabilities are receiving hospice music therapy out in the world!
ReplyDeleteI had to smile reading your post, because one of the ladies I work with (I work with people who have intellectual and developmental disabilities) absolutely adores "Amen" so our session has evolved into variations on a theme by "Amen" (she especially likes to shout "hallelujah" in between). I've adapted the song so we can sing "hello" and "goodbye" with it as well.
Songs are, indeed, powerful! Thanks for your post.