My apologies for not posting recently. I guess life caught up with me a bit the last few weeks and I didn't get to the blog. I'll try my best to not let it happen routinely!
This last week was rare in that I didn't have a ton of people to see at the end of the month, so I could take my time with each client I did see. One client in particular was especially enjoyable. She's one of those people who is either in a great mood or extremely anxious. She was in a good mood that day, but had been pretty anxious most of this week. We talked a lot about how she could cope when she is anxious and she stated that she will close her eyes, pray, and then sing silently to herself. I asked her what she sings and she stated that she sings old hymns. That lead to a nice time of reminiscing and discussion of her faith. She spoke of times when her faith has helped her cope with other things in her life. She was really talking a lot, which was fun for her and gave me a lot of good information.
I finally got into the music portion of our session by suggesting that we sing some songs that she can easily recall when she gets anxious again. She thought that was a good idea and I played and sang hymns with her that recalled portions of our conversation. "Nearer My God to Thee", "What a Friend We Have in Jesus", and "God Be With You 'Til We Meet Again" were some of her favorites that we identified as some that she could use and enjoy. While I sang, she stared at a picture of Jesus praying very intently. It was quite touching to see.
I guess the main thing I took from this session is just an affirmation of something I think we all know on some level. Regardless of faith or religion, our spiritual well-being is drastically tied to our sense of quality of life. Take some time this week to explore more how your beliefs affect your current sense of well-being and how you can take care of yourself spiritually today. It may mean praying, reading, taking a walk, talking with a friend, or just sitting quietly for a while. Whatever it means for you, take care of yourself this week!
Showing posts with label emotions. Show all posts
Showing posts with label emotions. Show all posts
Saturday, June 30, 2012
Thursday, May 17, 2012
Wind Beneath My Wings
This week, I met with a client I've had for a while and was trying to get her to open up more. I was hoping we could really process her situation, as it is rather hard. She's in her 50s and has a disease process where she understands what is going on, she's completely aware of her situation, but cannot do anything to stop it. She's at the age where she feels that she should be starting to take care of her parents and helping her son get ready for his wedding, but instead her parents and son are now having to take care of her. It's hard for her to stay in bed when she'd rather be outside, or rather, would rather be anywhere but a nursing home.
She enjoys the music she listened to when she was younger, which happens to be 80s popular music. With that in mind, I pulled out Bette Midler's "Wind Beneath My Wings", which you can listen to below.
Before I sang it, I asked her to think about who this song describes for her. After the song was finished, she said, "That's easy. It makes me think of my parents." We began talking about her parents and she was saying how they were such good people and really had tried everything to help her. As she was talking, her expression seemed to show that she was thinking very hard. At one point she stopped and said, "Me being in this situation must be really hard for them, too." I was so glad she made that shift in perspective. Not that she was complaining about herself before, but now it seemed that she was aware that her parents were grieving for her and it helped her to appreciate them that much more. She shared some stories of how they have helped her and then we discussed plans for her to tell them how much they mean to her.
I don't know if she has or will let them know how much they mean to her, but I know that she really is grateful for them and I just hope they know it.
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New blog to check out is : Bliss Music Therapy. She hasn't updated her blog for a while, but what she has posted is good information!
She enjoys the music she listened to when she was younger, which happens to be 80s popular music. With that in mind, I pulled out Bette Midler's "Wind Beneath My Wings", which you can listen to below.
Before I sang it, I asked her to think about who this song describes for her. After the song was finished, she said, "That's easy. It makes me think of my parents." We began talking about her parents and she was saying how they were such good people and really had tried everything to help her. As she was talking, her expression seemed to show that she was thinking very hard. At one point she stopped and said, "Me being in this situation must be really hard for them, too." I was so glad she made that shift in perspective. Not that she was complaining about herself before, but now it seemed that she was aware that her parents were grieving for her and it helped her to appreciate them that much more. She shared some stories of how they have helped her and then we discussed plans for her to tell them how much they mean to her.
I don't know if she has or will let them know how much they mean to her, but I know that she really is grateful for them and I just hope they know it.
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New blog to check out is : Bliss Music Therapy. She hasn't updated her blog for a while, but what she has posted is good information!
Friday, May 11, 2012
One More Session
Every once in a while, a nurse gives me a call and asks me to see a client who has taken a quick decline. Many times, patients who need extra support are given an "RLC" or "Radical Loving Care" designation for a short time. This is texted out to everybody in the office so they know who needs the extra help at that time. We all try to make it there, but I'm not always able to be there before they die. Many times, that is the end result of RLC, but sometimes the decline levels off and they may not need they extra support as much as initially thought. On Monday, I got the call before the text was even sent out, so I know it was important for the client and family that I be there, so first thing I did was stop there. This is the client who I spoke of in Play One More. When I got there, there were 3 daughters and some of their children, as well as the client's pastor. That is always a big red flag for me. Pastors always have people to see and things to do, despite all the jokes implying they only work for one hour on Sundays. If a pastor is just sitting in a chair in the dining room, waiting for something to happen, then I always assume something will happen soon. I got set up in the patient's bedroom [she lived in her own home] and invited everyone into the room. I wanted this to be a group session. I wanted to not only help the client relax [something she was not very good at in the past], but also to allow the family to communicate with the client, share stories, and feel the support that they were all providing for each other.
It started off with the family members showing little interest in being a part of music. Despite my encouragement, I was pretty much singing alone to the client. I began to engage the family more by asking them questions, specifically about music and their mother. They all seemed to recall a song she enjoyed, a story of the her dancing, or [for those that were there for my previous sessions] how she would light up during our sessions. This began a nice time of sharing and music. People would talk about songs she liked and I would play the ones I had. While playing, though, only one other person was singing. The only time I got them to sing was on the last song, "Jesus Loves Me." I set up by saying, "I can really feel the love you have for your mother. She's so lucky to have you here with her. This is an important time to spend with her and I know that she knows you're here. I know she's very happy you're with her. Let's sing this one like we're taking her place for a moment, thinking about what she's feeling right now." We started singing and everybody else joined it, tearfully making their way through that familiar tune. Even the pastor was getting misty, which speaks volumes about his connection and dedication to this family. After this, I tried to encourage them, told them to call with any concerns or changes, and left.
The patient died about an hour after I left. I will remember her fondly, as someone who walked in the first time assuming I'd be kicked out and was really welcomed with open arms, both in a literal and figurative sense. I hope Lillian's family knows how much their mother meant to everybody who got to see her.
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New to the music therapy blogosphere is The Traveling Songstress. Check out her new blog and give her some support!
It started off with the family members showing little interest in being a part of music. Despite my encouragement, I was pretty much singing alone to the client. I began to engage the family more by asking them questions, specifically about music and their mother. They all seemed to recall a song she enjoyed, a story of the her dancing, or [for those that were there for my previous sessions] how she would light up during our sessions. This began a nice time of sharing and music. People would talk about songs she liked and I would play the ones I had. While playing, though, only one other person was singing. The only time I got them to sing was on the last song, "Jesus Loves Me." I set up by saying, "I can really feel the love you have for your mother. She's so lucky to have you here with her. This is an important time to spend with her and I know that she knows you're here. I know she's very happy you're with her. Let's sing this one like we're taking her place for a moment, thinking about what she's feeling right now." We started singing and everybody else joined it, tearfully making their way through that familiar tune. Even the pastor was getting misty, which speaks volumes about his connection and dedication to this family. After this, I tried to encourage them, told them to call with any concerns or changes, and left.
The patient died about an hour after I left. I will remember her fondly, as someone who walked in the first time assuming I'd be kicked out and was really welcomed with open arms, both in a literal and figurative sense. I hope Lillian's family knows how much their mother meant to everybody who got to see her.
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New to the music therapy blogosphere is The Traveling Songstress. Check out her new blog and give her some support!
Friday, April 20, 2012
Music as a Coping Technique
I had an interesting session on Monday morning with a client. She's fairly young, in her late 60s, and had a rough weekend. One of her medications causes some blood thinning and she got a cut that would not stop bleeding. It had slowed and stopped by Monday, but emotions were still raw for her. She was very anxious and, literally, afraid for her life. Another bleed like that could be her cause of death. When I got there, I saw that she was attempting to convince me [and possibly herself] that she was doing okay. One thing I do feel I excel at, however, is reading people's emotions, and I was picking up that she was not feeling positive about her situation.
We talked for a bit and I began to offer song choice for her, which is one way that I've found to read people's emotions. This client, generally, chooses the song that reflects how she feels. I would offer a "happy" song and once that I felt seemed to reflect what she was feeling. She always chose the reflective song. After a few of these songs, I began to make reflections on the songs and "pry" into her emotions. After she realized what songs she had been choosing what she perceived to be "sad" or "negative", she began crying. I let her cry, without interrupting, and, when she had finished, I said, "It seems like the music is helping you cope with your emotions, but not in the way you thought it was." She agreed and discussed how she used music to "help me when I'm really down", but hadn't realized that by reflecting what she felt, she was coping.
I think a misconception of using music as a coping technique is that if you play happy music, it will make you happy. Conversely, in this scenario, if you play sad music, it will make you sad. People do not want to be sad, generally, so people may only play happy music. This coping technique, sometimes called avoidance, may be useful for some people, but they do not realize there are other ways. Reflecting the emotions, and owning up to them, can also be an effective way to handle emotions.
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Blog for the week is Music Therapy Source. It's run by a great hospice music therapist out of Iowa City.
We talked for a bit and I began to offer song choice for her, which is one way that I've found to read people's emotions. This client, generally, chooses the song that reflects how she feels. I would offer a "happy" song and once that I felt seemed to reflect what she was feeling. She always chose the reflective song. After a few of these songs, I began to make reflections on the songs and "pry" into her emotions. After she realized what songs she had been choosing what she perceived to be "sad" or "negative", she began crying. I let her cry, without interrupting, and, when she had finished, I said, "It seems like the music is helping you cope with your emotions, but not in the way you thought it was." She agreed and discussed how she used music to "help me when I'm really down", but hadn't realized that by reflecting what she felt, she was coping.
I think a misconception of using music as a coping technique is that if you play happy music, it will make you happy. Conversely, in this scenario, if you play sad music, it will make you sad. People do not want to be sad, generally, so people may only play happy music. This coping technique, sometimes called avoidance, may be useful for some people, but they do not realize there are other ways. Reflecting the emotions, and owning up to them, can also be an effective way to handle emotions.
---
Blog for the week is Music Therapy Source. It's run by a great hospice music therapist out of Iowa City.
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